Have you ever wondered what purpose you have in life? Have you ever asked yourself why you even exist? I have, and if you are like most people, you have too! One of the most important things we must realize about life is that God has a plan for us. Life is not just random and haphazard. God created you, He designed you, and He did it so that you would fulfill a God-given purpose! Here are 3 Steps to Becoming a Real Man!

A Plan For Your Life

So, what does it mean when I say that God has a plan for your life? Keep reading and you will discover what it means. But one thing is for sure, God is guiding you, leading you, urging you, influencing you toward that plan. Pay attention to my words – God has a very special plan for you life.

Your Family Matters and God desires certain attributes and abilities in your life to bless them. God has a plan to make you a A Godly Man. Men you need to understand that God wants you to be just like Jesus – not like Mike or Tiger or even Billy. Your heavenly Father wants you to be transformed into the image of Jesus. You need to ‘get’ that. Write it down. Tape it to your mirror. “Today I will strive to do things the way I think Jesus would do them.”

I

The first part of that plan is to make you a spiritual leader. What is a spiritual leader? The perfect example is Jesus – in fact God wants us to become Christ-like. The bible says,
“And we… are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory…”
2 Corinthians 3:18

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To find out what you are to become you need to read the Bible and study the life of Jesus and learn the fruit of a Spirit-filled life. You need to be in a Bible study at least weekly. How are you going to become Christ-like if you don’t know what Christ is like?

Spiritual Leaders

What our families need of us is to be Spiritual leaders. Of course we can’t be spiritual leaders even if we want to – if our wives won’t allow us to be the leader. God has to put it on our hearts to be spiritual leaders –but He also has to put it in our mate’s heart to allow us to be the leader. It takes two to make a leader.

Most people don’t even know if they are the leader or not. So how can you know if you are? The test of leadership is easy. Who do the kids go to when they want something? Who signs the report card? Who decides if we go to church or have family devotions? Whoever leads in those actions is the spiritual leader.

Most men don’t do it because it takes work and creativity. They would rather do their own selfish thing and go their own selfish way. A spiritual leader – above all – is sacrificial. The bible says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” Ephesians 5:25

Sacrifice

What that means for us men is that we need to be sacrificial. When we come home from work exhausted and burnt out – we need to muster up the energy to meet our wife’s emotional needs and have a conversation with her. We need to help her and motivate her to do good things.

“There comes a time when the boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.” What I’m saying is that the real measure of manhood is spiritual maturity or godliness. The “boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.”

There comes a time when we leave selfishness for selflessness. There comes a time when we “flee youthful lusts and pursue righteousness” (II Timothy 2:22). There comes a time when we show ourselves as men by leaving behind us everything ungodly and making the decision to walk with God.

Men, our families need godly men.

Men, our wives need godly men.

Men, our world needs godly men.

Will you be a man with me?

Let’s show ourselves strong by living for the Lord. So tell me … What kind of a Man are you?

II

And that brings us to the second part of God’s plan in making a godly man. And that is that the man must be a provider.  We need to provide for our families. Back in the old days, a lot of people thought that being a provider meant that you had a job and provided the material needs for the family – but it means much more than that. We are to meet financial needs, emotional needs, physical needs and spiritual needs. The bible says, “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever.” 1 Tim. 5:8

We men are called to provide for our families. Even ungodly men provide for the physical needs of their families – sometimes with the help of the court system.

Fatherless Children

Too many dads abandon their families. They give in to their lusts and create children without wanting the responsibility. But a father needs to be responsible. He needs to provide for the physical needs of the family -but we have to go beyond that and provide especially for the spiritual needs. How do we do that? First, by our example.

None of us are perfect. We have so many flaws and we err in judgment and just plain blow it so many times. But if our children can catch the idea that we are trying to do our best with what we have – it might help. When we blow it – apologize. When we err – admit it. When we can – correct it.

Perfect vs Godly

I don’t think our families expect perfection – but they need a humble, godly man to lead them to Christ-likeness. Part of that responsibility is to fill the role of teacher or coach. The Bible says, “fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
Proverbs 22:6

Dad’s, it is not the job of the government to educate your child – it’s yours. It’s not the government’s job to teach and train and discipline your child – it’s your’s. I have to tell you, it is a blessing to live in America where we have a ton of help out there – but ultimately it will be you standing before God on Judgment Day giving account of your actions and responsibilities.

I also want you to notice that we are to provide for our children a ‘Christian’ education. We are to train them in the way they SHOULD go. Some of you are fortunate to have a Christian school for you. But if that isn’t available and home schooling is not an option – then Church and Sunday school and family devotions are doubly important. Your job is to train them in the way they should go and be. In the schools today they are forced to learn about things they don’t need to know about or things they need to learn from the parents or church. Things like sex education and homosexuality and other religions. That is not the state’s responsibility. Their job is suppose to be to protect and serve us. They do not have the moral or spiritual experience or right to teach those things.

Protector

The school and the state should be the servant of the parent – not the other way around. And you, the father, are to protect and insure your child gets the proper godly training.

“There comes a time when the boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.” What I’m saying is that the real measure of manhood is spiritual maturity or godliness. The “boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.”

There comes a time when we leave selfishness for selflessness. There comes a time when we “flee youthful lusts and pursue righteousness” (II Timothy 2:22). There comes a time when we show ourselves as men by leaving behind us everything ungodly and making the decision to walk with God.

Men, our families need godly men. Men, our wives need godly men. Men, our world needs godly men. Will you be a man with me? Let’s show ourselves strong by living for the Lord. It’s time for men to learn how to Be a Man!

III

The Secret of How to Be a Man

And that brings me to the third part in God’s plan. That the godly man is to be a man. King David was a godly man. He was undoubtedly physically manly—he killed a nine foot tall man, a lion, and a bear with only a sling or a club, but I don’t think that is what makes you a man.

You see, manliness isn’t measured only by the size of our biceps or the courage of our hearts. David understood this. Listen to some of his last words to his son, Solomon:
I Kings 2:1-3 says, “As David’s time to die drew near, he charged Solomon his son, saying, ‘I am going the way of all the earth. Be strong, therefore, and show yourself a man. Keep the charge of the LORD your God, to walk in His ways, to keep His statutes, His commandments, His ordinances, and His testimonies, according to what is written in the Law of Moses, that you may succeed in all that you do and wherever you turn…’” (NASB).

Be Strong

King David was about to die and he wanted to teach his son, Solomon, how to be a man. He said, “Be strong and show yourself a man”. Then David tells his son what a man does. He walks in God’s ways. He said, “Keep all the statues and commandments.”
That’s the definition of a real man. You may be slight of stature and skinny and anything but a fighter. The world’s definition of a man is to be big and tough and don’t take any stuff off of anyone. But that’s not a real man. A real man walks in the will of the Lord. That’s what God is looking for. That is what our women are looking for. That’s what our children are looking for. That’s what our world needs.

A godly Man Is Strong. David said, “I am going the way of all the earth. Be strong, therefore…”

When David tells Solomon to “be strong” he isn’t talking about fighting or physical strength. David is talking about being strong by following God and walking in His ways.

Physical Strength

I think that, to David at least, physical strength is only a small part of real manliness. Do you remember when David faced the nine-foot tall Goliath on the battlefield? Do you remember what David shouted to him? I Samuel 17:45 says,
“Then David said to the Philistine, “You come to me with a sword, a spear, and a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have taunted.”

In other words, “You come to me with the strength of a powerful man, but I come with the strength of an almighty powerful God.” The name of the Lord is the source of real power. Men who rely on it are much manlier than those who don’t. Take Samson for instance. He trusted in his own muscles and look where it got him. If you want to know about toughness, strength, and manliness be sure to check these two verses out.

Zechariah 4:6 says, “…not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the LORD of hosts.”

Ephesians 6:10 says, “be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.”

Teach them

Men, teach your family what it means to stand strong for your God and your family. Teach them that meekness, justice, love, and gentleness aren’t weaknesses. Teach them that abstinence and sobriety are values to be honored. Show them what real strength is by following and imitating the creator of strength and power.

Does money and success determine manhood? If so, Donald Trump is your guy.

Manly Training Ministries

Does physical strength or fighting ability make a man? If so, maybe you look more to John Wayne or Bruce Lee.

Paul says: I Corinthians 13:11 says, “When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.”

“There comes a time when the boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.” What I’m saying is that the real measure of manhood is spiritual maturity or godliness. The “boy needs to sit down and the man needs to stand up.”

There comes a time when we leave selfishness for selflessness. There comes a time when we “flee youthful lusts and pursue righteousness” (II Timothy 2:22). There comes a time when we show ourselves as men by leaving behind us everything ungodly and making the decision to walk with God.

A Call To Action

Men, our families need godly men. Men, our wives need godly men. Men, our world needs godly men. Will you be a man with me? Let’s show ourselves strong by living for the Lord. Today I ask you to decide, will you be a man or a mouse? Will you be a Godly man or will you turn your back on God? Will you be a man that lives to serve his wife and children or will you be the man that lives to please himself? Choose today what kind of a man you will be, as for me and my sons, we will serve the Lord and be the men that God created us to be. Will you join us?

Published by Eduardo Quintana

I am an author and a speaker. I am the creator and CEO of Manly Training, an organization designed to bring Men to Christ and to Honor and Empower biblical Manliness. View all posts by Eduardo Quintana