Five (5) Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won't Tell You!

Five (5) Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

Most men just don’t understand what makes a woman tick. With that in mind, Here are five things your wife would like you to know but for a variety of possible reasons, she won’t tell you.

#5 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife feels overwhelmed and likes when you take charge. Between taking care of the children, making dinner, and keeping the home together, not to mention working, she has a lot on her plate. She wants you to be her partner, not another person to take care of. That’s why it’s music to her ears when you offer to make dinner or do bath time, even though you may have worked all day. Picking up some of the slack provides her tremendous relief and she sincerely appreciates it. Don’t wait for her to ask. Just do it.

#4 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife has a hard time turning off the “mom reflex.” She is not always attentive to you because she is preoccupied with the kids. It is not that she doesn’t care about you or love you, but is very difficult to stop thinking about them and their needs, even during adult time. While it is crucial to have alone time with your wife, understand how challenging it might be for her to refocus her energy on you and don’t take it as a sign of rejection.

#3 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife loves to be cherished. Even though you may not be inclined to express yourself emotionally, one way or another you have to let your wife know you love and cherish her. Tell her through words – written or spoken, or a thoughtful gift or a romantic getaway. It doesn’t matter how, just make her feel special. Guys may be able to go without many of these things, but to many women this is her oxygen. When you cherish her and make her feel important, she feels valued and appreciated as a wife. When she does not feel cherished, she may feel resentful or insecure about your relationship.

#2 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife is sensitive to other women and potential competition. Watch how you talk about other women and praise them, even for things that seem benign like, “Wow she’s a good mother.” She wants to be the best in your eyes. The thought of you praising someone else when you may not praise her enough may make your wife feel that she is not satisfying your needs. If you have women friends (probably not the best idea) or female colleagues, tread lightly. If your own marriage is going through a rough patch, having relationships with other women (friendships or business – not romantic), especially if you imply you enjoy their company, can be very painful for your wife.

#1 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife wants to be heard. Hear out her anxieties even if they seem trivial to you. Instead of telling her not to be worried, validate her fears and offer to help her. When she stresses out about next year’s carpool schedule, don’t brush her off. Genuinely listen and volunteer to help. Take practical steps together to relieve the anxiety, it calms her down and makes her feel taken care of.

These five points may be obvious, but you’ll be amazed at the positive and immediate effect they can have on your marriage. By taking charge when your wife feels overwhelmed, understanding how hard it is for her to turn off her “mom reflex,” cherishing her, being sensitive about talking about other women, and hearing and validating her, you are showing her that you are doing your part to creating a better and more fulfilling relationship.

Join the Discussion:

1. What do you do to show your wife love?

2. What kind of results have you gotten from your technique?

Please observe the following guidelines:

  • Try to be as positive as possible when you make a comment.
  • If there is name-calling, or profane language, it will be deleted.
  • The same goes with hurtful comments targeted at belittling others; we won’t post them.
  • Recommendations for people to divorce will be edited out–that’s a decision between them and God, not us.
  • If you have a criticism, please make it constructive.
  • Be mindful that this is an international ministry where cultural differences need to be considered.
  • Please honor the fact this is a Christ-centered web site.

We review all comments before posting them to reduce spam and offensive content.

 

How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise man.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

Do you Know How to Talk to Women?

Last week I explained that sacrificial love means taking the time to show your wife affection. However, sacrificial love also means loving your wife enough to talk with her. Do you know how to talk to women?

Women Need Conversation

Let’s talk about CONVERSATION – In a recent study done by a leading woman’s magazine, women said that their number 1 complaint about their husbands was that they didn’t talk to them enough.

Men, talk to your wives. Talk to your wife about her day, and about what interests her, and about how she feels. Talk to her. And women, you know that we men are sometimes a little weak in this area, so help us out. Let me share 3 steps you can take to help your husband talk to you more.

a. Show some interest in his interests.
b. Let your husband talk as much as you do.
c. Make conversations with your husband pleasant. You can and must discuss some unpleasant things from time to time, but don’t major on them. Don’t spend all your time talking about how your husband has let you down. Make your conversations as pleasant as possible.

Women and Sex

Unlike the need for sex, conversation is not an emotional need that can or should be met exclusively in marriage. Your wife’s need for conversation can ethically be met by almost anyone. But if it is one of her most important emotional needs, whoever meets it best will deposit so many love units, she may fall in love with that person. So if it’s her need, it’s crucial to your marital happiness that you are the one who meets it the best and most often.

The need for conversation is not met by simply talking to someone. It is met when the conversation is enjoyable for both persons involved. Good conversation is characterized by the following:

  1. using it to inform and investigate each other,
  2. focusing attention on topics of mutual interest,
  3. balancing the conversation so both have an equal opportunity to talk, and
  4. giving each other undivided attention while talking to each other.

Error Talk

Conversation fails to meet this need when

(1) demands are made,

(2) disrespect is shown,

(3) one or both become angry, or

(4) when it is used to dwell on mistakes of the past or present.

Unless conversation is mutually enjoyable, a couple is better off not talking to each other at all. An unpleasant conversation not only fails to meet the emotional need, but it also makes it less likely that there will be an opportunity to meet the need in the future. That’s because we tend to prevent our spouse from meeting our needs if earlier attempts were painful to us.

Dating Talk

Men and women don’t have too much difficulty talking to each other during courtship. That’s a time of information-gathering for both partners. Both are highly motivated to discover each other’s likes and dislikes, personal background, current interests and plans for the future. But after marriage, many women find that the man who would spend hours talking to her on the telephone, now seems to have lost all interest in talking to her, and spends his spare time watching television or reading.

If your wife’s need for conversation was fulfilled during courtship, she also expects it to be met after marriage. And if she fell in love because you met her need for conversation during courtship, she risks falling out of love if that need is not met during marriage.

Does she have a craving just to talk to someone? Does she pick up the telephone just because she feels like talking? If she sees conversation as a practical necessity, primarily as a means to an end, she probably doesn’t have much of a need for it. But if she uses conversation “just to talk,” and enjoy conversation in its own right, and is frustrated when she hasn’t been able to talk to someone for a while, consider it to be one of her most important emotional needs.

Men, sacrificial love requires affection, it requires conversation, and it requires Honesty & openness. Next week we will dive into understanding how Honesty and openness can transform your relationship with your wife.

This is part 3 of this series. I have received numerous emails and tweets about this series, so I pray it will continue to bless you. If you missed the first two parts, here are the links so you can catch up.

The Manly Training Show – A Fun Christian youtube Video Blog

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise man.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

Man Up and Show Some Affection! - THE MAN OF HER DREAMS (PT 2)

Man Up and Show Some Affection! – THE MAN OF HER DREAMS (PT 2)

Men, if you want to be the man of your wife’s dreams you must man Up and Show Some Affection!  You need to love her sacrificially and unconditionally. Now I believe that sacrificial love today, in the context of pleasing your wife, involves 5 requirements. Number 1. If you are going to love your wife, you need to show her affection.

– 1 Corinthians 7:3 – “Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband.”

AFFECTION

The word translated in this verse as “Fulfill his duty,” basically means to show affection, to show good feelings, or to make feel good.” Men, you need to show your wife affection, you need to show her some romance as well. To most women, affection symbolizes security, protection, comfort, and approval. Men, when you show your wife affection, you are telling her that she is important to you and that you are proud of her.

How to Show Affection

Men, there are a million ways to show your wife affection. There are a million ways to romance her. One good place to start is with a hug. A hug, when you’re not expecting anything in return, can say a lot to your wife about how much she means to you. Most women can’t get enough of them. Tell me men, how often do your hug your wife? How often do you rub her back when you walk by her, and you’re not after anything? Men, women are people of touch. They are encouraged by touch. Hug your wife.

Here’s a novel Idea!

You can show your wife affection and a little romance by taking her out to eat unexpectedly. I’m reminded of the story of the midwest couple who went to sleep one night, only to be awakened in the middle of the night by a tornado. Before they knew what was happening, the tornado had picked them and their bed up and began to carry them through the sky. All of a sudden, the woman began to cry. Her husband turned to her and said, “This is no time to be crying.” His wife answered, “I can’t help it. This is the first time we’ve gone out together in 20 years.” Men take your wife out to eat every once in a while.

Be A Gentleman!

And while you’re at it, open her car door and the restaurant door for her. Hold her hand while you’re walking from the parking lot. Let her see that you love her, that’s she’s 2016-12-14-08-23-05-1important to you, and you don’t care if the whole world knows it.

It Takes Time

Affection also requires time. You need to spend time with your wife, doing things you both enjoy doing. Affection and romance take time.

Romance & Affection

Men, send your wife some flowers, send her a card, call her on the phone in the middle of the day and tell her that you’re thinking about her. Gentlemen, romance and affection can be inexpensive, but you’ll never fulfill your wife’s dreams without it.

Sacrificial love means taking the time to show your wife affection. Sacrificial love also means loving your wife enough to talk with her.

It’s Time to Wear The Pants Husbands!

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise man.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

Become the Man of Her Dreams, Avoid the Nightmare!

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and you want to become the man of her dreams and avoid the nightmare, do you? Well, are you willing to sacrifice for her? Let’s find out what it takes.

What it Takes

The only way your marriage is going to be all you want it to be is for both husband and wife to be in tune with Jesus Christ.

Getting Jesus first, is the easy part to figure out. How exactly we men play our part in the plan is a bit more difficult to evaluate some times. As I was thinking about the difficulty of trying to hash out how you and I can become the men of our wives’ dreams, 2 thoughts came to mind.

Two Bad Ideas

First, I thought about the Diet Coke commercial, where the women in
the office building all gather at the window to watch the construction worker across the street take a break. Knowing that most of us do not look exactly like the model in the commercial, I thought we had better figure out a way to work with what we have.

The second thought that crossed my mind was that I could get my wife to write this message and have her tell us men how to become the man of our wives dreams. I was afraid of doing that, however, for fear that I wouldn’t be the man she described.

What does the Bible Say?

I finally decided that I had better check the Bible and see what it says about being a great husband. Probably the best passage of Scripture on this is found in the book of Ephesians 5:25-33

In verse 25, Paul says that husbands are to “love your wives as Christ loved the church”. The standard is pretty high isn’t it? But, what does it mean to love your wife as Christ loved the church? What can you do to become the man of your wife’s dreams?

#1 – You need to love your wife with a sacrificial love.

When Jesus came into the world, He loved the church. He loved us enough to leave heaven and all of its comforts, come to earth, take on a human body, be spat on and made fun of, crowned with a crown of thorns, and nailed to a cross. That’s what sacrificial love is, and that’s required if you are going to be the man of your wife’s dreams.

Now, when God said for you and I to love our wives that way, He didn’t say they deserved it. God didn’t say your wife was worthy of that kind of love. And He didn’t say to love her that way if she did something to deserve it or if she did something for you in return. The Lord said, “DO IT!” Sacrificial love is unconditional. If God waited until we deserved His love before He sent His Son, He never would have loved us. But, He did. He loved us like we were. The Bible says that, “God showed His love for us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” When you were at your worst, God still loved you.

An Awesome example

In march of 1990, Robertson McQuilkin, the former president of Columbia Bible College, announced his resignation with the following letter.

“My dear wife, Muriel, has been in failing mental health for about 8 years. So far I have been able to carry both her ever-growing needs and my leadership responsibilities at Columbia Bible College. But recently it has become apparent that Muriel is contented most of the time she is with me and almost none of the time I am away from her. It is not just “discontentment.” She is filled with fear – even terror – that she has lost me and always goes in search for me when I leave home. Then she may be full of anger when she cannot get to me. So it is clear to me that she needs me now, full time. Perhaps it would help you to understand if I shared with you what I shared at the time of the announcement of my resignation in chapel.

The decision was made, in a way, 42 years ago when I promised to care for Muriel “in sickness and in health . . . till death do us part.” So, as I told the students and faculty, as a man of my word, integrity has something to do with it. But so does fairness. She has cared for me fully and sacrificially all these years; if I cared for her the next 40 years I would not be out of debt. Duty, however, can be grim and stoic. But, there is more; I love Muriel. She is a delight to me – her childlike dependence and confidence in me, her warm love, occasional flashes of wit I used to relish so, her happy spirit and tough resilience in the face of her continual distressing frustration. I do not have to care for her, I get to! It is a high honor to care for such a person”.

It’s your Turn

My friend, if you want to be the man of your wife’s dreams, love her like that. Love her sacrificially and unconditionally. In the next few weeks we will learn what this means and look at the five (5) requirements of Sacrificial Love to our wives.

If you enjoyed this post, I’d be very grateful if you’d help it spread by emailing it to a friend, or sharing it on Twitter or Facebook. Thank you!
—Manly Training –

How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

How has our marriage lasted this long?

How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

Marriage Today – How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

Last year my wife and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary! I’ve been really excited lately because on December 14th, we celebrate 26 years of marriage! So, after 25 Years, I find myself asking a profound question; “How Has This Marriage Lasted This Long?”

1991 Wedding Picture
1991 Wedding Picture

It doesn’t seem like it for me, but 25 years is a long time! For the past several days, I’ve been thinking about our marriage and how it is that we have made our marriage last this long in a day and age when marriages seem to be doomed for failure!

Have we ever had disagreements and arguments? Of course we have! Even the most devoted couple will experience a stormy bout once in awhile.

For The Sake Of Our Marriage

A grandmother, celebrating her golden wedding anniversary, once told the secret of her long and happy marriage.

“On my wedding day, I decided to make a list of ten of my husbands faults that I would overlook strictly for the sake of our marriage.” A guest asked the woman what some of the faults were that she had chosen to overlook.

The grandmother replied, “To tell you the truth my dear, I never did get around to listing them. But whenever my husband did something that made me hopping mad, I’d say to myself, Lucky for him that’s one of the ten!”

Let’s focus on our relationships! Mostly around the concept of marriage but I want you to understand that when I speak of relationships, this includes all the relationships we have as Christians. Especially in the context of the church.

Just Married Yesterday
Just Married Yesterday

 

Is Love Ever Really Enough?

I want to address the common, almost universal belief that says, “As long as you genuinely love each other, everything will always work out.”

One of the most tender scenes from the Fiddler on the Roof occurs on the night of his daughter’s wedding, when Tevye asks his own wife of 25 years, “Do you love me?”

Their marriage had been arranged and, as he had said to his wife, “My father and mother said that we would learn to love each other. And now I’m asking you, Golde, do you love me?”

After reciting some of the ways her love for him has been expressed over those 25 years, she replied, “I suppose I do.” Then he responds in a chorus where she joins him and says, “After 25 years, it’s nice to know.”

And it is. It’s nice to know you are loved. In fact, it is absolutely essential to the survival of the human spirit to know and experience love!

Yet nothing is any more of a myth than to believe that love is all you need to build and maintain a lasting relationship of any kind. Especially a marital and family relationship.

A True Love Story

The Wedding Cake
The Wedding Cake

One of the most fascinating love stories in all the Bible gives a clear illustration of the fact that love is not always enough to maintain a deep and enduring relationship. If there was ever a marriage made in heaven, this was it. The marriage between Isaac and Rebekah!

It was a marriage that got off to a wonderful start. But then, as this couple neared their golden wedding anniversary, their marriage was threatened by misunderstanding, deceit, and miscommunication. Only by the grace of God is love strong enough to resist those kinds of self destructive forces.

According to the Bible, Isaac was 40 years old when he got married. Today that is getting up there for a man to be taking the big plunge. In this case it was even his father who eventually took the initiative in finding Isaac a wife.

Abraham’s Dating Service

The custom of the times was for the father to make the arrangements. And in keeping with that custom, Abraham appointed his most reliable servant as matchmaker. And this servant was to go back to Chaldea to find a wife for Isaac.

This servant was given very specific instructions. Abraham wanted a bride for his son who was a good match. A match in character, personality, background, and religious faith. (It looks like Abraham would be an easy target for the computer dating services we have now).

But he believed that a proper matching was an essential foundation for a successful marriage. I wonder how many of you would be married to the same person if this same custom were in force today!!

I don’t know about you, but I never had a list of parents who thought I would be the ideal person for their daughter. But the important thing to remember here is that Abraham knew that who a person marries does make a difference.

Cloud Nine

Now, every couple who is about to be married I’m sure has dreams about their life together. They have this vision about a life filled with shared interests, common goals and values and the same cares and concerns. Sometimes it’s right out of a Harlequin romance novel.

Many newlyweds feel so lucky, especially on their wedding day. They feel lucky to have met someone who understands them and shares their likes and dislikes. Someone who is just so obviously right for them.

I do. The vows.
I do. The vows.

Weddings  often bring such joy! Watching two people so “love struck” that they often do some of the silliest things. But weddings are some of the most interesting occasions.

A Tale of Two Preachers

That reminds me of the story of an elderly preacher who advised his young preacher friend that when he was performing a wedding, if he ever forgot a part of the marriage ceremony to start quoting Scriptures until he remembered.

Well the second wedding the young man did, sure enough the preacher forgot. The only Scripture that would come to his mind was, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do!”

But no matter how ideally suited my wife and I are, at some point we realized that ours is not a perfect match. We realize that we do not always agree! We do not always think, feel, and behave the same way.

The blending of the our individual personalities, preferences, and backgrounds is much harder than we ever imagined. When this happens, many are shocked and devastated when the bubble finally bursts.

The Honeymoon is Over

The common phrase “the honeymoon is over” is one that every couple seems to end up saying at one point in their marriage. It is so common to hear of a friend confiding in another that: “This is not the same person I married!”

Someone once said that while love is blind, marriage isn’t. Now, it’s not always that marriage partners don’t see certain truths about their spouse before the wedding. Many times they simply choose not to see them.

They get swept up in the romance and the excitement and the passion they just don’t want to focus on anything but the positive. They are so in love that nothing could ever get in their way.

But sadly, love doesn’t conquer all. Most couples who get divorced were in love when they were first married. That is something we need to think long and hard about, because it is true. Just being in love is not enough! Being in love can never be the primary reason for marriage.

Well, if love is not the first and final word in relationships, then what else could there be? The Bible consistently stresses the importance of compatibility in relationships.

Do Not Be Unequally Yoked

The Apostle Paul specifically urged the Corinthian Christians to avoid marriage with non Christians. And that is one of the most obvious failures of Christians today. Recent statistics indicate that the odds are not in favor of couples who marry outside their faith. I must tell you that when my wife and I became engaged, this was one of the most important things on my list. And it turns out that it as also on the top of my wife’s list.

The rate of divorce, separation, or annulment for these marriages is nearly 4 times greater than for marriages between those of the same faith. This may be hard and cruel, but just look around and see the problems that exist because of that very thing.

There should also be common interests with your spouse. Today, many families have both partners in the work force, which means that the only time a couple really has to get together is after work, and the cooking and cleaning up after supper is finished.

For most couples in this situation, that means little time to actually relax and enjoy each other, especially if there are kids. If you don’t marry someone who can be your friend as well as your roommate and financial partner, you are headed for trouble.

Together Time

That means you spend much of your “free time” together doing things you both enjoy.

Getting "Camotes" together
Getting “Camotes” together

He should not off with the guys and her off shopping or grabbing or conversing or whatever. What were those common interests you both shared when you were dating?

Now, I don’t mean that you have to be identical to your mate at every point. Nothing would be any more boring than to be in a relationship with someone exactly like you.

It simply means, as Abraham realized, that the more common ground there is, the better the relationship. For some of you, that means you better find out what those areas are and begin to share them once again.

But even a successful marriage will encounter problems, as we see from the account of Isaac and Rebekah. They had married, and their love for each other continued to grow, even though their marriage was arranged for them by their families.

LOVE

But there is something here that I find very interesting. This is the first time in Scripture that love is even linked with marriage. It is apparent that the idea of love as the basis for a lifelong union between a man and a woman was a rather late development.

Neither Isaac or Rebekah had ever laid eyes on each other until after all the arrangements had been made, and Rebekah came to Canaan for the actual wedding. But the love that developed between them was genuine and lasting. It remained strong even in the light of the problems that developed.

A Dysfunctional Family

Now, their twin sons, Esau and Jacob, were at least 40 years old when the marriage faced it’s most serious threat. The Bible describes the problem in simple and concrete terms, it was over the children!!

Isaac had always been more drawn to Esau, the firstborn. He was a rugged outdoorsman, and extrovert who was liked by everyone. But Rebekah found it easier to be close to Jacob. And to complicate the whole matter..these two brothers had always been extremely competitive with each other.

In fact, the nature of their relationship had been determined from birth. Esau was first but Jacob was right behind, holding his brothers foot as if to hold him back so that he could get ahead of Esau.

In O.T. times it was common for the father to give a blessing to the son who would succeed him as head of the family. The blessing always went to the firstborn son. This blessing was a tangible as well as legal power to the one who received it. And once it was given it could never be canceled.

The Deception

One day Rebekah overheard Isaac tell Esau that it was time for him to pass on the blessing. But since Isaac was blind, Rebekah and Jacob seized the opportunity to deceive the old man and steal the blessing from Esau. Through a clever series of acts and disguises, they succeeded in taking what was not rightfully theirs.

And what this woman and her son did was a blatant and intentional act of deception and

Walking together as husband and wife
Walking together as husband and wife

fraud. It broke the sacred trust that is essential to an honest relationship, especially one between a husband and wife. And above that, it showed a basic contempt for the family.

Whether you are aware of it or not, everything you do, everything you say, think or feel reveals whether you see the world in terms of “I, me and mine” or in terms of “We, us and ours.” And that is what makes a family a family.

We Are Family

You see, families are failing because we fail to see the world from a family perspective. We have believed the world’s lies and come to the conclusion that its every man for himself. We think that  if I don’t take care of me, nobody else will!

And that’s the idea that Rebekah and Isaac seem to have adoptedand that they apparently passed down to their children. It didn’t matter to Rebekah and Jacob what family tradition dictated. It didn’t matter how heartbroken Isaac would be if he ever learned of the fraud.

And it didn’t matter how severe and painful the negative impact on Esau would be to have this precious, irrevocable, paternal blessing stolen from him. The only thing that mattered was to get what they wanted for themselves.

But I want to tell you that reverence, respect, and love for the family requires the decision to value the family over everything else in the world…including your individual personhood. A family is dedicated to the importance of a family point of view.

A Family Commitment

The reason we are so committed to the family is that we know that the family nurtures and

25 Years Ago we did this!
25 Years Ago we did this!

encourages the development of each family member. As each individual is dedicated to family welfare, the family is committed to individual development and security.

The primary goal of the family is to make sure that everyone is given the chance to live and love happily within the family system. And I want to warn you…if your family does not come first…if the needs of any individual family member comes before the needs of the whole family…that family will not last!

It is not simply an issue of setting priorities. The issue is one of making difficult choices for your family. There can only be one “Number one.” Will it be you…or your family?

25 Years!


Help Manly Training!

Truth time: Manly Training Ministries is a full time job – on top of my Area Manager Job and being a husband and a Father! I easily put 30+ hours a week into creating the content for Manly Training– whether it’s dreaming up posts, creating art images, responding to emails and comments, and managing my social media feeds.

There are two ways to help me do this!

1) By donating directly through PayPal –>  Donate Button with Credit Cards

2) by joining me over at Patreon!

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

MTM Won’t Change, I Promise.

But don’t worry! MTM is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!

https://www.patreon.com/manlytraining



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING