The Conquer Series – The Battle Plan (week 5)
What matters in life is not how you start, but how you finish. This lesson is designed to help men finish strong. Getting free from sexual bondage will be one of the hardest things a man will ever do in his life, which is why men need practical principles for the journey ahead. The strategies and principles taught in this lesson are based on biblical principles for renewing the mind and deepening one’s relationship with Jesus Christ.
At the root of sexual bondage is an intimacy disorder. We walk men through the steps in restoring true intimacy with God and their wives. These biblical strategies will not only help men from acting out sexually, but allow them to walk in a life of purity. They will discover how they can become a weapon in God’s hand and have sweet revenge against the enemy.
TOOLS TO CONQUER
Physiological Note: Once your heartbeat reaches 100 beats per minute, your prefrontal cortex shuts
down. This is now a “fight or flight” brain. This is what happens with arousal and is why tools to conquer are so important. Once a man has reached this point, his prefrontal cortex shuts down for up to 3 hours whereas a woman can work through this in about 30 minutes.
CALM YOURSELF DOWN
You have to be able to control your breathing to deal with your arousal sequence. Remember, Abraham was meditating long before Buddha
• Learn deep breathing which helps calm your brain’s limbic system.
o Close eyes
o Put one hand on chest / One hand on stomach
o 3 deep breaths
When doing this right, you will feel the hand on your stomach moving more than on
Breathing from the diaphragm actually activates a nerve that helps the brain calm.
• 5 minutes, 3 times a day is suggested by Ted Roberts. Take this time to meditate on Christ
o Changing the brain takes regular and consistent effort. RENEW THE MIND
Consistent efforts help create new pathways
We have to pressure the brain to do this new things so that the new pathway
becomes more efficient than the old pathway.
o Much of this change is physical in the brain but do not forget that this is spirit which is as
real as the brain.
o Rodeo Story: Rob Smets
• You must become aware of your situation and be intentional with your decisions.
THE POWER OF INTENTIONALITY
Consider the intentionality of Jesus. The power of His life, as a man, was the intentionality of His life…He is a man of prayer. He said, “I only do what the Father shows me to do.”
• Prayer strips away the inconsequential
• Prayer is what brings us to a focus and a man with a focus has direction and he makes decisions
based on that direction
We should pray for “spiritual fathers” in our life. God will give you new memories. Ask God to bring
healing. Ask God to bring new father figures. Ask God to give you new experiences that will give you new pictures. All of these new memories can replace the old dysfunctional experiences of the past that weigh us down. God can bring healing to the depth of your soul.
• Most men who are trapped in sexual sin have deep father wounds.
• Ask God for new spiritual fathers to be brought into your life.
o Not to replace your memories but to reframe them in light of God’s love for you.
CHARACTERISTICS OF A CONQUEROR
No man can become a conqueror without emotional healing! Because emotional wounds not only create emotional problems, they create spiritual problems.
• Conquerors deal with their wounds.
o Look inside and look at the wound
o Let Jesus bring healing to the wound
o 2 things will happen
Your relationship here around you will get better because your emotional intimacy
will go up
Your relationship with the Father will go up because you will no longer be grieving
the spirit with unforgiveness and the shame and the bitterness you have been
holding on to in your woundedness.
• Conquerors make a plan
o Men make a plan…boys make excuses
o Have a plan for those hard times so you don’t act out
• Conquerors are under spiritual authority
o When you are under spiritual authority, you are protected and when you are not under
spiritual authority, you are not.
o You must be under authority, sexually
o A man must enter into a process and…
• Conquerors never quit
o Some think that once they struggle or relapse…”That’s it!” NOT true! That is part of the
• Conquerors surrender to grace
o Stop fighting and start listening to men that have been there
o Why surrender? Because in my own power, it does not work
o Try harder just does not work
There are 4 things that need to take place with anyone who is struggling with sexual bondage in their life as far as nurturing ourselves. S.E.E.D.S.
• Social Contacts… be part of a group of at least 4 other guys that know everything about you.
• Exercise… Get some good blood flow so new neurons can be constructed.
• Education… You have to understand the addictive dynamics you are fighting.
• Diet… You eat junk, you get a junky brain.
• Sleep… Minimum of 7 hours for the brain to function correctly.
o While asleep, your brain processes the trauma you experienced during the day.
o Most of us will have to prepare for battle each night.
No electronic media ½ hour before bed
15 minutes of deep breathing and meditating on Jesus Christ
15 minutes of memorizing your prophetic promises or something else that really
connects you with Christ
Note: Alcohol impairs the prefrontal cortex and inflames the limbic system drive.
Note: Healthy food leads to a healthy brain.
• When Christian men unchain themselves from sexual inappropriateness, they will be released to
lead. And, when Christian men lead, history shows that cultures are changed and transformed!
• Winning this battle is a “die daily” experience.
• Manhood and Christlikeness are synonymous.
• There must be a daily refilling of the Holy Spirit.
• Fix your eyes on Jesus.
• What matters now is what you do with the tools you have been given.
THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING