How to show your wife you love her

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Five (5) Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!


1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

Most men just don’t understand what makes a woman tick. With that in mind, Here are five things your wife would like you to know but for a variety of possible reasons, she won’t tell you.

#5 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife feels overwhelmed and likes when you take charge. Between taking care of the children, making dinner, and keeping the home together, not to mention working, she has a lot on her plate. She wants you to be her partner, not another person to take care of. That’s why it’s music to her ears when you offer to make dinner or do bath time, even though you may have worked all day. Picking up some of the slack provides her tremendous relief and she sincerely appreciates it. Don’t wait for her to ask. Just do it.

#4 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife has a hard time turning off the “mom reflex.” She is not always attentive to you because she is preoccupied with the kids. It is not that she doesn’t care about you or love you, but is very difficult to stop thinking about them and their needs, even during adult time. While it is crucial to have alone time with your wife, understand how challenging it might be for her to refocus her energy on you and don’t take it as a sign of rejection.

#3 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife loves to be cherished. Even though you may not be inclined to express yourself emotionally, one way or another you have to let your wife know you love and cherish her. Tell her through words – written or spoken, or a thoughtful gift or a romantic getaway. It doesn’t matter how, just make her feel special. Guys may be able to go without many of these things, but to many women this is her oxygen. When you cherish her and make her feel important, she feels valued and appreciated as a wife. When she does not feel cherished, she may feel resentful or insecure about your relationship.

#2 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife is sensitive to other women and potential competition. Watch how you talk about other women and praise them, even for things that seem benign like, “Wow she’s a good mother.” She wants to be the best in your eyes. The thought of you praising someone else when you may not praise her enough may make your wife feel that she is not satisfying your needs. If you have women friends (probably not the best idea) or female colleagues, tread lightly. If your own marriage is going through a rough patch, having relationships with other women (friendships or business – not romantic), especially if you imply you enjoy their company, can be very painful for your wife.

#1 – Things Your Wife WANTS You to Know, But Won’t Tell You!

  • Your wife wants to be heard. Hear out her anxieties even if they seem trivial to you. Instead of telling her not to be worried, validate her fears and offer to help her. When she stresses out about next year’s carpool schedule, don’t brush her off. Genuinely listen and volunteer to help. Take practical steps together to relieve the anxiety, it calms her down and makes her feel taken care of.

These five points may be obvious, but you’ll be amazed at the positive and immediate effect they can have on your marriage. By taking charge when your wife feels overwhelmed, understanding how hard it is for her to turn off her “mom reflex,” cherishing her, being sensitive about talking about other women, and hearing and validating her, you are showing her that you are doing your part to creating a better and more fulfilling relationship.

Join the Discussion:

1. What do you do to show your wife love?

2. What kind of results have you gotten from your technique?

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How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

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I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



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Become the Man of Her Dreams, Avoid the Nightmare!


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Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and you want to become the man of her dreams and avoid the nightmare, do you? Well, are you willing to sacrifice for her? Let’s find out what it takes.

What it Takes

The only way your marriage is going to be all you want it to be is for both husband and wife to be in tune with Jesus Christ.

Getting Jesus first, is the easy part to figure out. How exactly we men play our part in the plan is a bit more difficult to evaluate some times. As I was thinking about the difficulty of trying to hash out how you and I can become the men of our wives’ dreams, 2 thoughts came to mind.

Two Bad Ideas

First, I thought about the Diet Coke commercial, where the women in
the office building all gather at the window to watch the construction worker across the street take a break. Knowing that most of us do not look exactly like the model in the commercial, I thought we had better figure out a way to work with what we have.

The second thought that crossed my mind was that I could get my wife to write this message and have her tell us men how to become the man of our wives dreams. I was afraid of doing that, however, for fear that I wouldn’t be the man she described.

What does the Bible Say?

I finally decided that I had better check the Bible and see what it says about being a great husband. Probably the best passage of Scripture on this is found in the book of Ephesians 5:25-33

In verse 25, Paul says that husbands are to “love your wives as Christ loved the church”. The standard is pretty high isn’t it? But, what does it mean to love your wife as Christ loved the church? What can you do to become the man of your wife’s dreams?

#1 – You need to love your wife with a sacrificial love.

When Jesus came into the world, He loved the church. He loved us enough to leave heaven and all of its comforts, come to earth, take on a human body, be spat on and made fun of, crowned with a crown of thorns, and nailed to a cross. That’s what sacrificial love is, and that’s required if you are going to be the man of your wife’s dreams.

Now, when God said for you and I to love our wives that way, He didn’t say they deserved it. God didn’t say your wife was worthy of that kind of love. And He didn’t say to love her that way if she did something to deserve it or if she did something for you in return. The Lord said, “DO IT!” Sacrificial love is unconditional. If God waited until we deserved His love before He sent His Son, He never would have loved us. But, He did. He loved us like we were. The Bible says that, “God showed His love for us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” When you were at your worst, God still loved you.

An Awesome example

In march of 1990, Robertson McQuilkin, the former president of Columbia Bible College, announced his resignation with the following letter.

“My dear wife, Muriel, has been in failing mental health for about 8 years. So far I have been able to carry both her ever-growing needs and my leadership responsibilities at Columbia Bible College. But recently it has become apparent that Muriel is contented most of the time she is with me and almost none of the time I am away from her. It is not just “discontentment.” She is filled with fear – even terror – that she has lost me and always goes in search for me when I leave home. Then she may be full of anger when she cannot get to me. So it is clear to me that she needs me now, full time. Perhaps it would help you to understand if I shared with you what I shared at the time of the announcement of my resignation in chapel.

The decision was made, in a way, 42 years ago when I promised to care for Muriel “in sickness and in health . . . till death do us part.” So, as I told the students and faculty, as a man of my word, integrity has something to do with it. But so does fairness. She has cared for me fully and sacrificially all these years; if I cared for her the next 40 years I would not be out of debt. Duty, however, can be grim and stoic. But, there is more; I love Muriel. She is a delight to me – her childlike dependence and confidence in me, her warm love, occasional flashes of wit I used to relish so, her happy spirit and tough resilience in the face of her continual distressing frustration. I do not have to care for her, I get to! It is a high honor to care for such a person”.

It’s your Turn

My friend, if you want to be the man of your wife’s dreams, love her like that. Love her sacrificially and unconditionally. In the next few weeks we will learn what this means and look at the five (5) requirements of Sacrificial Love to our wives.

If you enjoyed this post, I’d be very grateful if you’d help it spread by emailing it to a friend, or sharing it on Twitter or Facebook. Thank you!
—Manly Training –

How Has Our Marriage Lasted This Long?

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING