a father’s love

Father's Day, MY FATHER, The Manly Training Show, TRIBUTES, VIDEO

There is Only One Way to be a Dad – Happy Father’s Day.


Every Father needs to know this. Every man should apply himself to it. What is it? Watch this quick 5 minute video to find out. But if you want to become the man that God created you to be and if you want to be the father you must be, then watch this. There is Only One Way to be a Dad – Happy Father’s Day. (more…)

Advertisements
BLOG, BLOG FOR DADS

God wanted me to Come Home too – by Dave Moore


1 Comment

The Sin Of A Father

Growing up!
Growing up!

I grew up in the 60’s and it was a great time to grow up. We played outside endlessly. My father worked afternoons and with school all day I didn’t see him a whole lot. There were six of us kids and my mom worked tirelessly to take care of us and always gave us tremendous love. Alcoholism in our family was a dirty secret that our family lived with for a long time. My father was not only a casual drinker but also a binge drinker. As children we witnessed our father many times slapping and hitting my mom until she was bloody. It forever affected all of us profoundly.

I Was Angry

For many years as a young adult I too was a binge drinker and an angry drunk. It didn’t pexels-photo-274192.jpegtake long after my first drink that I wanted to fight someone and usually it was for no reason. Although I had a hatred for anyone raising a hand against a woman I took my anger out on men. Bar fights, road rage, you name it I probably did it.

In my late 20’s my son was born and when he was 1-1/2 years old I took custody of him and began raising him as a single father. I wanted to love my son in a way that my father never loved me. I wanted to be there for every school event, sports game, and protect him from the world. So I became obsessed and over protective in such a way that he was not being allowed to actually be in control of his own life. I was also still having anger issues and had become a “my way or the highway” type of parent. We need to find a balance in everything we do.

I Was Destroying My Son

 

I don’t believe that my dad set out to be the father that he became nor did I. But, my behavior towards my son was destructive in its own way.

Then one day my son, a college freshman, disappeared. We had no idea where he was and why he had left. My father had died a few years earlier and it was very hard. The thought of losing a child is indescribable. It is a parent’s worst nightmare. Had the sins of my father turned me into a father that had caused this? And what of my own sins? Can I blame them on my father and not accept responsibility for them?

God Saved Me

pexels-photo-576926.jpegAfter a cross-country search for my son without any success I came to the end of myself and cried out to God for help. God gave me a miracle. He came into my heart and saved me. A wave of forgiveness and love poured over me that you cannot understand unless you have experienced it. I asked God to forgive everyone that had ever hurt me including my father. I asked God to forgive me for everyone that I had ever hurt.

God through revelation and His word began to teach me how to be a better father and a better man. I am still not the man I want to be but thank God I am not the man I used to be. What I also realized through my surrender was that not only was I looking for my son to come home but God was looking for me to come home too.

I Will Not Die Without Him

My father and mother both received the free gift of salvation through Christ before they died as has my whole family. Jesus died that the sins of a father and everyone else can be forgiven by simply asking Him and accepting Him as our Savior. Christ gives me love, hope, and direction. Not only can I not live without Him, I will not die without Him either.

  • Dave Moore

DaveMoore_Small

Teaching My Son To Combat Rejection Like A Man

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

We Won’t Change, I Promise.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

 

BLOG, BLOG FOR MEN

Joseph’s Life and What Christmas Meant for Him (Joseph)


This Christmas Season I have decided to write and speak about  Joseph’s life and what Christmas meant for him (Joseph).  It’s important to mention that Joseph has no speaking parts in the Christmas story. The Bible never quotes anything that Joseph said.

Matthew 1:18-1:25

With that in mind, I want to take some creative liberties and put some words into Joseph’s mouth. It’s important to let my readers know that this piece is just a creative work of art and not a biblical story or sermon. Nevertheless, properly used, it can serve as a most powerful tool to minister to men, especially the unbelievers. Let me set the scene here:

Joseph’s Monologue

A Christmas play

Joseph is sitting in a fine looking chair. He sits next to a workbench. It is obviously his workspace.   As you already know, he is a carpenter and a very good one! He’s focused on something and turns to see you.  As he turns his head you hear him saying :

Abraham begat Isaac.
Isaac begat Jacob.
Jacob became the man we know as Israel, and he in his turn became the father of Judah and his many brothers.

This was the beginning of long line of ancestors that are mine.
My name is Joseph, a carpenter from the town of Nazareth.

In my culture, every Jewish boy and girl was required to memorize their ancestry. Beginning with Adam and Eve, going on thru Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. On thru David and Solomon and the many great kings of Judah.

Joseph Speaks to The Audience

(at this point Joseph stands up and continues)

They did this because God had made a promise to my people.
Through the Prophet Isaiah God had declared that “Unto us a child would be given, unto us a son would be born. His name would be called ’Wonderful Counselor’, ’Mighty God’, Everlasting Father’, ’Prince of Peace.’ The government would be upon his shoulders, and of the increase of his government and of his peace there would be no end.”

Every Jewish family dreamed that God would honor them by allowing them to be the parents of this great messiah. They hoped that they would be permitted to raise the next King of Israel – a king promised to bring deliverance from the chains of bondage.

Just a Carpenter

But… I am just carpenter.
A good carpenter, but still, just a carpenter.
I’m neither a prophet nor a priest, nor a man of regal blood such as a prince or king.

And Mary – sweet girl that she is – is of as humble background as I and my family are. We were under no illusions that we could actually become the parents of the great Messiah.
Our marriage was arranged… as were all marriages of that day. For more than a year before we physically became husband and wife our families became as one. We were intertwined. We would spend our days together. Eat together. Her parents would get to know me… and my parents would get to know her.

A Good Arrangement

It was a good arrangement.
It became the strength of good families and the foundation of good marriages.

And Mary came from good stock.
She was a gentle girl – easy on the eyes.
The men of Nazareth envied me…

The Shame

Then one day it was discovered (pause) that she was pregnant.
And I was not the father.

(pause and breathe deeply)

Her family was understandably upset.
Mine was devastated… shocked… angry
“Divorce her, quickly and publicly” they said.

But I like Mary

(climb the rest of the steps to the stage and turn again)

I’ve always liked Mary.

(pause, look down, pause look straight at the audience)

But, of course, they were right.
My parents would never accept her.
And the people of Nazareth would never forget.
If I took Mary as my wife, we would have to pack up my tools and move far enough away so that the taint of her shame would not follow us.

The Right Thing To Do

They were right.
It would best if I forgot her.

But how could I forget her…
Her eyes could melt my soul and her smile could lite up a room.
Her voice, it was like (place yourself so that your face would be lit up by the stage lighting) that of an angel.

(pause)

Well, no.
Not really.
Once you’ve heard the voice of a real angel there’s nothing quite like it.
The voice of a woman – at its best – is soft, and gentle, and comforting.
But the voice of an angel…(pause) is terrifying!

The Angel of God

There I was, asleep on my bed, when suddenly the room was filled with light. And there at the foot of my bed… stood an angel.

“FEAR NOT!” he said
Fear not?
“Do not be afraid to take Mary to be your wife. For what is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. And Mary shall give birth to a son and you shall give him the name Jesus. For He shall save His people from their sins.”

As the angel spoke, I felt a stirring within my heart, and I recalled an obscure passage from Isaiah that even the rabbis struggled with.

Speaking of the coming Messiah Isaiah wrote: “and he shall be pierced for our transgressions, he shall be crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brings us peace is upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.”

I Doubted

(pause…)

(as you speak gradually make your way down the steps on the other side of the stage and eventually return to the area in front of the pews)

There are those – to this very day – who wonder if I truly believed what the angel said to me that night.

And you know… they’re right.
I’d never spoken with an angel before!
Have you? (point to a person in the audience)
Have you? (point to a person in the audience)

As Mary’s pregnancy progressed, I increasingly wondered if I had truly heard the voice of an angel that night… or if I had merely imagined what I hoped to hear because I so much wanted Mary to be my wife.

The Census

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. It was decreed that everyone should return to the home of their family and register with the government.

Since I was of the family and of the line of David, I was required to return to our ancestral city – Bethlehem, far to the South. So I and Mary, who was far along in her pregnancy, made the long journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem. But when we arrived, we found that so many people had come to Bethlehem to register that the Inn was full, there was no room for us.
Fortunately, we were able to find a cave just outside of town that was being used as a barn and found shelter there for the night.

That night, Mary gave birth to a son.
I cut the cord, washed his body and wrapped him in clean, warm cloths and laid him in a feeding trough – the manger where feed was placed for cattle. Then I sat down beside Mary and held her close.
We talked for a long time about visions we had received… and we wondered if what we had heard was really true.

Could It Be?

Suddenly at the entrance of the cave (rush over to the side of the auditorium to create impression of cave’s entrace) we saw that some men had gathered.
There were 14, 15 of them. Shepherds who told us they had come a fair distance from the fields where their flocks were bedded down for the night.
They said that while they were watching over their sheep, the night suddenly became filled with light. A host of angels filled the sky singing praises to God:
“Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!”

One of the angels told them “Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

So they had left their flocks and come to find out if what the angel had told them was true. Quietly, they gathered around the manger, and bowed in worship of our son.

Jerusalem

Eight days later, as the law required, we took Jesus to the great city of Jerusalem to have Him circumcised, and to offer two turtledoves as a sacrifice to God. When we reached the place where this act was to be performed, the man who was to circumcise Him – his name was Simeon – took Jesus from us and raised Him up before God and offered thanks. He told us that God had promised him that he would not die before he had been allowed to see the Lord’s anointed.
No sooner had he said this, when an older lady, a prophetess of the temple named Anna, approached us and also gave praise to God for this child that would be the salvation of Israel. She then spoke with everyone she met about our child.

The Wise Men

We returned to Bethlehem and I set up shop to apply my trade as a carpenter.
For two years we lived there until – one day – strangers came to our home. They were visitors from a far off country who said they had seen a star in the East that their religion told them spoke of a great king being born. So they had followed the star for many months until they had come to our home. When they saw Jesus, they came and bowed in worship of him. And they gave us gifts of gold, frankincense and Myrrh.

If we had any doubts, by now they were completely removed.

I picked up the carpenter’s tool again.

Joseph the Father

Now, the Gospels don’t tell you what a unique experience it was to be the step-father – if you will – of the Son of God. After Jesus was born, I fully took Mary to be my wife – for up until that time we had not slept together as husband and wife – and eventually she bore us 4 more sons and two daughters. But none of that could have prepared me for the responsibility of raising Jesus as our son.

For example, when he was 12, we took him with us to Jerusalem for the feast of the Passover.
And we lost Him!

We searched for hours until, at last, we found him sitting in the temple, speaking with the rabbis and teachers of the Law… and He spoke as one who was intimately familiar with the Scriptures!

The young Jesus

As He grew older, I taught Jesus my craft… but it seemed He rarely had time to work. People would enter our shop and ask questions of Him that they would never ask of the Rabbis and the scribes.
And when He did work, He often used the money He received to give to the poor.

It seemed like Jesus was always giving things away.
Even during His ministry, He gave things to people
There was a man who had been crippled since his birth – and Jesus gave him new legs.
He met another man who was blind – and gave him new eyes.
A young man who had been tormented by the powers of darkness and was dangerous to be around… and Jesus gave him a new mind.
A terrible disease had taken the life of a young girl – and He gave her new life.

Jesus Gave to Everyone

Jesus gave to everyone.
As the scriptures tell us: He did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross!

That was the reason He came – to give His life for ours.
As the prophecy had said: “He was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for iniquities. The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him and by His wounds we were healed.

He suffered all that for us.
He gave His life for us so that we might have new eyes, a new mind, a new life.
And He did all this because He chose to.
Jesus wasn’t forced to die on the cross… He chose that kind of death… because He chose us.

That decision on the part of God leaves only one thing yet to be done.
God chose you….

Will you chose Him?

The Manly Training Show – A Fun Christian youtube Video Blog

Patreon Members:

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

Just Click here and go to Patreon to start receiving

exclusive material from Manly Training.

 

We Won’t Change, I Promise man.

Manly Training is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!

 



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAINING

 

 

NATIONAL ADOPTION MONTH

8 Steps to Becoming a Perfect Adopted Father


2 Comments

8 Steps to Becoming a Perfect Adopted Father – National Adoption Month

I became a dad through adoption five years ago. I was scared and had no idea what I was supposed to do, but I was excited at the idea of being a father! Then I realized that I was not alone when it came to feeling this way so I wrote “8 Steps to Becoming a Perfect Adopted Father”.

Most Americans seem more confused than ever about the role of fathers in children’s lives. On the one hand, more and more fathers are absent for all or significant periods of time. According to the 2006 Census, 23 percent of children under 18 do not live with their biological father. In 2012 the statistics show that 1 in 3 US children live without a father in the house, 33.33%. And in 2015 this number jumped to 45%. On the other hand, search “fatherhood” on the web and you’ll find dozens of websites dedicated to teaching, encouraging, and supporting men in becoming more nurturing and involved fathers. Mine is just one of many websites that try to fill the need.

The Media

Meanwhile, many TV sitcoms and animated shows continue to portray dads as idiots or, at best, well-meaning but misguided large children whose wives have to mother them as well as their offspring. If an alien in another universe happens to tune in to The Simpsons, Everyone Loves Raymond, Family Guy, etc., he (it?) will come away with a rather skewed idea of how men function in American families.

I’ll leave it to the sociologists to explain the many and complicated variables of race, class, gender issues, social policy, employment issues, and governmental interventions that are at the root of the diverging trends and the pejorative TV scripts. It’s enough to note that there is a major rethinking of fathers’ roles and responsibilities going on within the context of lots of rethinking in America.

8 Steps to Becoming a Perfect Adopted Father - National Adoption Month
8 Steps to Becoming a Perfect Adopted Father – National Adoption Month

As a country, we may be reconsidering how family should be defined. We may be confused about gender roles. We may be struggling with knowing how to parent well in a complicated time. But in the midst of all this confusion, there is a growing consensus that what kids need, at least, is clear. Kids need their fathers as well as their mothers.

Regardless of whether the father lives with his children, active participation in raising those children is good for everyone. The kids become healthier adults. The fathers come to a fuller and more complex maturity. The mothers have a reliable co-parent to share the responsibilities and challenges as well as the accomplishments of parenting. How does this idea of “involved father” translate to daily life? Current research points to the following practical guidelines for responsible fatherhood.

What’s a Father To Do?

Embrace your responsibility.

Once you are a father, you are a father for life. It doesn’t matter if you became a father the traditional way or via adoption!

The knowledge of fatherhood changes a man. It can be a source of pride and maturity or a source of shame and regret. Even if you have good reasons for not being actively involved, acknowledging your paternity is a minimal gift you can provide to your child. With it come many legal, psychological, and financial benefits. If you want to be in your child’s life, it also protects your rights to have time with your child should you and the child’s mother have a falling out.

Be there.

In study after study, kids consistently say they would like to have more time with their dads. Regardless of whether a dad shares a home with the children and their mother, the kids need dad time. Working together on a chore or simply hanging out can be as meaningful as attending events or having adventures. Kids want to know their fathers (natural or adopted). Just as important, they want their fathers to know them.

Be there throughout their childhoods.

There is no time in a child’s life that doesn’t count. Research has shown that even infants know and respond to their fathers differently than they do to their mothers. The bond you make with a baby sets the foundation for a lifetime. As the kids get older, they’ll need you in different ways but they will always need you. Insistent toddler, curious preschooler, growing child, prickly adolescent: Each age and stage will have its challenges and rewards. Kids whose parents let them know that they are worth their parents’ time and attention are kids who grow up healthy and strong. Boys and girls who grow up with attention and approval from their dads as well as their moms tend to be more successful in life.

Respond to the needs of the kids, not your relationship with their mother.

Regardless of whether you are getting along with your girlfriend or wife (present or ex), your relationship with the kids is exactly that: your relationship with the kids. Kids need predictability. Children need care and a loving relationship with you. They need whatever financial support you can provide. None of these things should depend on whether you’ve had a disagreement or fight with their mom. None of these things should ever be withheld as a way to get even with her.

Be in a respectful and appreciative relationship with their mother.

Being a good dad is certainly possible both inside and outside of marriage. Regardless of whether you and their mom can work out how to be a committed couple, you can support each other as parents. Kids grow best when their parents treat each other with respect and appreciation. The kids then don’t feel torn between the two people they love.

Do your financial share.

Kids need to be fed, clothed, housed, and cared for. Children whose parents provide for them live better lives, feel valued, and have better relationships with both their parents. They need the role model of a responsible male acting responsibly. Just as they need you to be present in their lives, regardless of whether you live with their mom, they also need you to live up to financial obligations to the very best of your ability.

Balance discipline with fun.

Some dads make the mistake of being only the disciplinarian. The kids grow up afraid of their dads and unable to see the man behind the rules. An equal and opposite mistake is being so focused on fun that you become one of the kids, leaving their mother always to be the heavy. Kids need to have fathers who know both how to set reasonable, firm limits and how to relax and have a good time. Give yourself and the kids the stability that comes with clear limits and the good memories that come with play.

Be a role model of adult manhood.

Both boys and girls need you as a role model for what it means to be adult and male. Make no mistake: The kids are observing you every minute. They are taking in how you treat others, how you manage stress and frustrations, how you fulfill your obligations, and whether you carry yourself with dignity. Consciously or not, the boys will become like you. The girls will look for a man very much like you. Give them an idea of manhood (and relationships) you can be proud of.

Beyond these considerations, there is little agreement about how an “ideal father” should behave. It doesn’t seem to matter (in terms of the mental health of children) whether fathers work out of the home or stay home with the kids. There is little importance on what job a dad has or how much money a dad makes, as long as he is doing his best. It doesn’t seem to matter what his interests and skills are, as long as he shares them with his children. It doesn’t seem to matter whether a father is very physically affectionate or loves more quietly as long as the kids know that he most certainly cares about them.

What matters is for fathers to be committed to their children and involved with them over time. When fathers take that responsibility seriously, their children are more likely to do well and the fathers have few regrets.

God Wants You to Love the Orphans of the World


It’s Not About The Money!

Truth time: Manly Training Ministries is a full time job – on top of my Area Manager Job and being a husband and a Father! I easily put 30+ hours a week into creating the content for Manly Training– whether it’s dreaming up posts, creating art images, responding to emails and comments, and managing my social media feeds.

There are two ways to help me do this!

1) By donating directly through PayPal –>  Donate Button with Credit Cards

2) by joining me over at Patreon!

Patreon allows you to pledge as little as $1 a month, and in return you’ll get some pretty cool rewards, ranging from your name and blog on my MTM VIP page, exclusive content, and PODCAST VERSIONS of my posts!

MTM Won’t Change, I Promise.

But don’t worry! MTM is still going to be EXACTLY what it is now — New Posts every Tuesday and new Podcasts every Monday. Patreon perks are simply that: extra perks!

I have big plans for Manly Training– including a book AND a YouTube channel.

Your pledge will help me continue to put the considerable time and effort into each and every post that makes Manly Training what it is.

So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I pray every day for each and every one of you who take the time to read my words. You are a blessing.

Thank You!

https://www.patreon.com/manlytraining



STAY CONNECTED BY EMAIL. CLICK HERE

© 2017 MANLY TRAININ